RHOC, Season 11, Episode 16–Bringing up the Ghosts: The Bus Ride from Hell

The ladies are in Ireland, and Kelly has been getting on everyone’s nerves. She made some comments about Tamra’s daughter that sent Tamra over the edge. Off camera, Tamra pushes Kelly, but we get the audio, and she very clearly says she will kill her. It’s ugly, and the women are still recovering from the fight, especially Heather.

Heather is furious that the whole incident resulted in them getting kicked out of a store. Fancy Pants is not used to being treated like this. She calls Vicki, who is exhausted after staying up all night drinking with Shannon. Vicki wants the fighting to stop and is happy that she and Shannon are finally getting along.

Meanwhile, Kelly and Meghan meet for breakfast in Meghan’s room. Kelly is exhausted too and feels like everyone is against her. Meghan reports that the genealogist says she is related to most of the people in the local town, and she wants to investigate.

The other women are heading off to a milk farm, while Meghan wisely wants to keep Tamra and Kelly separated for now.

A solid plan.

Tamra was literally foaming at the mouth the day before.

The women head out to the farm, and Vicki, who always manages to hurt herself, gets her finger stuck in the trunk of the car. I enjoy this more than I should. This girl gets hurt on every single trip. At this point, we can count on it.

Meanwhile, Meghan and Kelly go looking for Meghan’s relatives, and it is mad boring. I’m sure Meghan finds the whole genealogy thing fascinating, but watching it? Not so much.

The other women are at the farm, being exactly as obnoxious as we would expect. “Ew! It smells!” “Ew! It looks like a wiener!”

You can take the girls out of the OC, but you can’t take the OC out of the girls.

Kelly and Meghan meet up with the other women, and both Kelly and Tamra are nervous about seeing each other after their altercation the day before. They have a beautiful barbecue on the farm, and I love this stuff. Of course, I assume they are going to fight the whole time and ruin it.

Oh, wait.

Kelly offers a really nice and sincere apology, and I am shocked. This is classic Kelly, and Heather points it out. She behaves badly—really badly—and then apologizes and wants to move on.

Tamra thanks her, but she is clearly still very upset. She looks terrible, like she has been crying all night. She tells Meghan that she needs to stay away from Kelly right now because Kelly is “testing her Christianity.”

Okay.

Some of the women go for a bike ride, and naturally, Vicki hurts herself again. I love it. At this point, getting injured on a Housewives trip is basically part of Vicki’s itinerary.

Meghan and Tamra go off on their own to continue exploring Meghan’s ancestry, and I don’t care.

At their picnic lunch, Heather is pushing alcohol on Kelly, who insists she doesn’t want to drink. Kelly seems to realize that the women like to poke at her when she does, so honestly, she is wise to avoid alcohol around this group. 

They go to a lovely dinner, and Tamra, Shannon, and Heather pregame while talking shit about Kelly’s outfits and her boobs. Kelly once again says she doesn’t want to drink. She feels attacked and alone. Vicki, who is supposed to be her friend, didn’t even stick up for her, and now Kelly feels like everyone hates her.

She is pretty much right.

Tamra says they are all wearing black for Kelly’s funeral, and the women, particularly Shannon, are clearly trying to get Kelly to drink throughout dinner. Shannon even orders her a double shot of tequila after Kelly has already said no.

The women all start making eyes at each other, as if some plan has gone horribly awry, and Shannon orders Kelly another drink.

Kelly won’t drink. She stands firm, and the other women seem genuinely disappointed.

Then Shannon actually leaves the table to whisper to the waiter and asks him to make the shots doubles.

What is going on here?

Seriously. Kelly has spent this entire trip behaving badly, but now the women seem determined to get her drunk after she has explicitly told them she doesn’t want to drink. This has gone way beyond poking the bear. They’re practically handing the bear a cocktail shaker.

Kelly takes a small sip, and Shannon immediately orders more. Even Vicki admits it is clear that Shannon is trying to get Kelly drunk so she will misbehave. Kelly says she feels an ambush coming on, and boy, is it!

Kelly sees through the plan and stays sober. Smart girl. She is going to need her wits about her.

Five hours later, we get talking heads of Meghan saying World War III broke out that night.

Vicki and Kelly went to Tamra’s room to ask her to come drinking with them, and Tamra said no. Then Shannon apparently came out of her room and questioned Kelly about why she was going out. Tamra, Shannon, and Heather went to the hotel bar, and Vicki ditched Kelly to meet them.

Vicki, ever the loyal friend, starts talking shit about Kelly and tells Tamra that Kelly has been talking about her. Tamra then texts Kelly a picture of herself and Vicki together.

Because she is twelve.

The next scenes are filmed with the women’s cell phones, and if I were staying in this hotel, I would be pissed. They are screaming in the hallways in the middle of the night. Heather is filming everything as Kelly completely melts down. Vicki totally started this, and Kelly just wants to go home. She is crying and clearly overwhelmed by the entire situation.

At 3:20 a.m., they board the bus to the airport, and all hell breaks loose.

The women take turns poking at Kelly. Kelly calls Shannon a drunk. She tells Shannon to shut up and shave off the hairs on her chin.

This is low, even for Kelly.

Shannon tells Kelly that she should hope to look like her when she is 52. Kelly tells her to stop attacking her if she doesn’t want to be insulted. Honestly, there is some logic there, although Kelly’s insults are getting increasingly vicious.

Heather says she feels bad for Kelly’s kids. That’s low, too. She then tells Kelly she is having a psychotic break, which is something Heather seems to throw around way too casually whenever she wants to discredit someone. It reminds me of what happens with Shannon at Lizzie’s dinner party in Season 9.

Heather calls Kelly trash, and at this point, the entire situation has become ugly on every side.

Then we get a preview of what is coming next, and, holy shit, apparently we haven’t even reached the worst part yet. This is definitely the bus ride from hell.