We’re back in Jamaica with the ladies, and Shannon Beador has been gearing up to completely lose her shit.
I love a good Shannon-style meltdown.
She has to move, she went through an ugly divorce, and her life is generally a mess, so this trip is basically the perfect storm for a Shannon meltdown.
Let’s dig in.
On night two of the trip, the girls are getting ready for dinner in the mind-numbing heat. Shannon is not happy. She can’t function in the heat and it’s giving her swamp ass. Vicki and Shannon take turns fanning their vaginas. At least they do this before dinner.
Gina and Emily again discuss how rude Shannon is being, which seems to be the theme of the trip. Shannon and Vicki drink on the way to dinner and are ready to whoop it up! The women have to wait for them and are a little annoyed.
Shannon announces that she is having her eyes done when she gets back to California, so this is her party night.
Brace yourself.
They start talking about Kelly’s dating life, and she jokingly teaches Gina how to flirt. Shannon looks judgy and keeps drinking. She is bored, and she is not hiding it.
Tamra is tired of Shannon hating any conversation that doesn’t revolve around Shannon. She promises that Fun Shannon is coming out.
Shannon admits she is not good with change, but says she is trying to open up to Gina and Emily, even though they are the new girls this season.
We see a flashback of Shannon’s silent dinner with Gina, which ironically, was not at The Quiet Woman.
Shannon starts getting her crazy hands going and says she is under a lot of pressure and the women don’t understand. Tamra and all the other women agree that they have stuff going on in their lives, too. Especially Gina, who is in the middle of a divorce with three young kids.
Emily chimes in, and Shannon immediately jumps on her.
Tamra says Gina and Emily feel like Shannon doesn’t even look at them. Shannon insists Tamra is one of her best friends, and Gina hits her with, “Oh, yeah, and you don’t even check on her when her husband has surgery.”
And just like that, Gina puts Tamra on the spot.
Shannon is pissed and tells Gina not to go there. Shannon just wants to have fun. She just needs a few more drinks.
Fun Shannon is nowhere in sight as Shannon goes after Gina. Gina tells her to let Tamra speak for herself. Tamra’s frozen face looks as nervous as it possibly can, and she hesitates.
That’s enough for Shannon.
She bounces from the table and storms into the bathroom. Tamra follows her, and we hear Shannon screaming through the door. Tamra just wants her to calm down.
Shannon insists that her problems are bigger than anybody else’s. Tamra tells her to flip the switch and start being more positive.
Shannon yells that she is positive!
But she’s overwhelmed.
They have been in the bathroom for so long that the restaurant is closing, and they have to leave.
Kelly tries to talk to Shannon on the way to the van back to the hotel. Shannon is all wound up and not willing to listen to anyone.
Kelly confirms that Tamra says Shannon is not there for her and is a selfish friend. Shannon puts her icy face on and gets on the bus.
Tamra tries to talk to her and be positive, but Shannon calls her out for talking shit and saying Shannon is not a good friend. Shannon just wants a moment to be left alone.
The other women look exhausted by her.
The women plan a nightcap, and Shannon storms upstairs to take a moment and wash her face. She doesn’t want to be filmed and yells at production to stop following her.
Shannon does this all the time.
Tamra goes after her, and Shannon keeps yelling. She wants ten minutes to herself to decompress.
Shannon takes her ten minutes.
Tamra says this is why she is afraid to ever confront Shannon, and Kelly says that isn’t much of a friendship. Gina feels responsible for unleashing the Beador Beast.
Tamra says that Shannon has never worked and has no concept of real life. Vicki agrees that Shannon has rich girl problems, not real problems.
Don’t they all?
Kelly and Tamra discuss Shannon’s midnight, teary phone calls, and Vicki says maybe Shannon needs to get on some meds if she is crying every day.
I love my meds, so I am all for this.
Kelly says David must have been a saint to stay with Shannon every day, and WOW, is she ever lucky Shannon doesn’t hear that.
At 12:30 a.m., the girls get Shannon and tell her they can finally move to a villa with air conditioning.
Hallelujah.
Shannon is too hurt and upset to pack up, so they stay fighting in the heat for now. Shannon is furious with Tamra for talking about her. Vicki and Kelly try to stick up for Tamra and get Shannon to calm the fuck down, but we are way past that stage of the game.
Shannon says everyone is turning on her and insists that she has always defended Vicki, which is categorically untrue. She was totally against Vicki for a long time.
Vicki calls her out on this, and now they are both yelling.
Kelly screams at Shannon that she is going to give herself a heart attack and needs to relax. Shannon points out that Kelly is rarely calm, and honestly, fair point.
Shannon again insists the women don’t understand what she is going through. They remind her that they all have their own shit, but Shannon is having none of it. Tamra says Shannon cries every night. Shannon insists she doesn’t do that.
Anymore.
Kelly brings up medication, and Shannon freaks out like a buffalo chicken. She gets wildly defensive, waving her hands around like she is directing traffic.
Tamra has officially had enough and tells Shannon to stop screaming for once in her life and actually listen.
Instead, Shannon starts rattling off her problems and accomplishments like she is presenting her résumé to a jury.
No one can get through to her.
Shannon insists she is excited about her life and doesn’t cry. She is tearing up and wiping her eyes as she says this, by the way.
Kelly is being surprisingly calm for a change, while Shannon continues yelling over her. Tamra just wants Shannon to shut up, which is probably not going to happen anytime soon.
They start screaming at each other again, and Shannon is still pissed that everyone wants her to go on medication. Tamra denies actually saying that.
The two finally storm away from each other, and at this point, I am wondering why the hell they are still standing in this heat instead of going to the air-conditioned room.
I would be.
The next day is Day 3 in Jamaica, and everyone has a Shannon hangover.
Vicki and Tamra are happily enjoying the air conditioning in the new villa, while Kelly calls her daughter.
Vicki calls room service and asks the operator if she thinks Shannon will like her again.
I don’t know why, but this absolutely cracks me the fuck up.
I love Vicki when she is being silly and not self-righteous.
We find out that Shannon has moved into a room by herself, and nobody has seen her since. They keep trying to call her, but Shannon is apparently in witness protection.
The women head out to go bobsledding.
Tamra reveals that Eddie is actually happy she finally had it out with Shannon. He finds Shannon annoying and thinks she treats Tamra like shit.
Tamra feels validated.
The other women are shocked.
And Shannon is still hiding.
They arrive at the bobsledding place, and Vicki immediately starts twerking. Everyone wonders if she has had butt implants.
I think she just has a big butt and likes to show it off.
I would, too.
Everyone agrees they are having a lot more fun than they did the night before, which isn’t exactly a high bar.
They do the bobsled, and it actually looks like a lot of fun.
Shannon would hate it.
So would I.
I am more of an indoor girl.
Vicki decides to buy Shannon a souvenir T-shirt, proudly announcing that Shannon is an extra large while Vicki is a medium.
She makes sure everyone knows this.
Several times.
It makes me laugh.
At lunch, they discuss and feel Vicki’s ass some more. Vicki wants to drink, drink, drink.
They talk more about Shannon, who is still ignoring everyone. Vicki genuinely hopes she is okay, while everyone else seems to think it is The Shannon Show, as usual.
Vicki says she has seen Shannon drinking vodka in the middle of the night before, and they all agree that she is basically self-medicating.
The episode ends without Shannon ever resurfacing, and the ladies seem to have a surprisingly great time once The Shannon Show goes off the air.
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