We start in New York, where Camille is getting ready for the Tony Awards and looking fabulous. She toasts to thirteen years of marriage. Kelsey smirks.
Camille and Kelsey head to the awards, and he is positively icy to her during the limo ride. He has already told her he is done with the marriage, and it’s painfully obvious that he has moved on before she has even had a chance to catch up.
Back in Beverly Hills, Kyle visits her psychic. She brings her mother’s ashes and some of her hair to the meeting, and I’m not going to make a snarky comment about that because people grieve in odd ways.
The psychic immediately senses Kyle’s conflict with Kim over the New York situation. Kyle feels like Kim didn’t stick up for her against Camille, which is apparently becoming yet another thing these sisters have to work through.
Taylor visits Lisa at Villa Blanca. Lisa is not exactly crazy about Taylor, but she agrees to attend a birthday party that Russell is throwing for her. Lisa blames Taylor for the conflict in New York and questions her about what she said to Camille that upset her so much.
Taylor, naturally, blames the whole situation on Kim. Lisa tells her that she should stay out of it, but Taylor wants to confront Kim, because apparently the Beverly Hills conflict-resolution strategy is to insert yourself into every argument you possibly can.
At Lisa’s house, she has a designer over to help her choose a dress for Taylor’s birthday party. Cedric is going to the party, too, but Lisa admits that it’s time for her longtime houseguest to leave. That particular arrangement has apparently reached its expiration date.
Next up, Kim goes for a makeup lesson. She tells the makeup artist that she’s usually pretty no-frills and has never really learned how to do her makeup. She was working as a teenager and then became a mom, so she never had much time to fuss over her appearance. Kim says she doesn’t feel like she fits in with the other women and wants to spruce up her look, with a pretty dress and pretty makeup for Taylor’s party. It makes me sad that Kim is trying so hard to find her place with everyone, even with her sister as part of the group. Plus, as we learn, Kim is battling some other demons, and Kyle knows it. I think she should be looking out for her more.
At Taylor’s, she meets with a woman about rehoming her daughter Kennedy’s dog because of Kennedy’s allergy. I hate sad animal stuff, so I’m skipping most of this. I hope the dog wound up in a great home and had a great life.
Back at Lisa’s, Cedric is living his best life, rocking his Speedo by the pool. Ken is increasingly irritated by Cedric’s leisurely approach to being a houseguest. He tries to speak to Cedric about moving out, but Cedric seems like he’s heard this conversation before. I don’t think he takes Ken seriously at all.
We cut to Kyle’s. Her dress for Taylor’s party looks like it was made by Edward Scissorhands. It’s a vibe. Taylor and Russell are awkward together, and Taylor is hoping the party will go well as they make their way to the venue.
Meanwhile, Camille tells her friend that she can’t pull herself together enough to make the party. She tells us that when she arrived at her New York apartment, the doorman didn’t even recognize her as Mrs. Grammer because another woman had already been living there. It’s really fucked up.
I love Frasier, but Kelsey is a douche.
Taylor’s party is on a rooftop, and I love a good rooftop. Especially in Los Angeles. Everyone arrives, and Kim is late. Kyle tells us this is typical and says she finds it embarrassing.
We then move away from the party and see Camille saying that she feels like Kelsey is emotionally torturing her. It sure sounds that way. She has decided to file for divorce because it’s clear Kelsey is already gone.
Back at the party, Kim arrives, and looking back at this episode after all these years, I feel bad that she made such an effort to look nice for the party. It’s clear that she’s uncomfortable and overdoing it to appear fine.
Kyle whispers to Lisa that Kim seems drunk, and I think it’s shitty. If you think your sister is drunk, and you know she has a drinking problem, get her out of there. Don’t gossip about it and make her look worse.
Kim circulates around a bit and makes some painfully awkward small talk. I don’t remember if this was quite so tough to watch the first time around, but the rewatch is uncomfortable.
As the cherry on the awkward cake that is this episode, Russell gives a speech for Taylor. It is also painful, especially knowing what we now know about the alleged abuse in their relationship.
Lisa questions Taylor about her marriage. Lisa is always in everyone’s business, and I’m not convinced it’s because she actually wants to help.
Paul fights with Adrienne because she doesn’t eat, and this was before the Ozempic craze. I mean, it’s Beverly Hills. Of course she doesn’t eat.
Taylor goes to speak with Kim and rehash the whole Camille/Kyle/New York fight yet again. Taylor thinks it was Kim’s fault. Kim looks like she feels attacked, and none of these women will let this thing die. I feel bad for Kim, who just wanted to look pretty for this party.
Kim starts saying that during the New York fight, she took Kyle out of the situation and comforted her, which isn’t really true, but Kyle is a big girl and was handling herself.
Speaking of Kyle, she watches the whole exchange between Kim and Taylor like a hawk, just waiting to jump in.
Kim says Taylor is fake. Kyle comes over to get involved, and Kim looks overwhelmed and panicked. They argue over whether Taylor said “insignificant” or “invisible.” It’s nonsense.
Suddenly, all of the women are surrounding Kim in her beautiful new dress with her fancy hair. Kim says she doesn’t like any of the women or enjoy their company, and Kyle immediately jumps on her, asking if Kim means her, too.
Kim gets her velociraptor finger going and tells Kyle to watch her step. Kyle starts pointing her finger, too.
Kim hates confrontation and says everyone is stirring the pot, including Lisa and Taylor. Lisa gets offended, and Kim questions how Kyle chooses her friends. Kim and Kyle argue over who is the better sister and who has each other’s back more.
The women start to walk away from the fight, and Kim asks Taylor to stay away from her, which is pretty reasonable considering it’s Taylor’s party. Kim just wants to be left alone. She’s crying and wants to leave, and I just keep picturing the woman who was so excited to look nice for this party.
Adrienne tries to talk to Kyle and plead Kim’s case, but Kyle says Kim is a problem and that she’s alone for a reason. Kyle is a lousy sister. She brought her sister onto this show and now seems determined to humiliate her.
Kim tries to leave, but production sticks her in a limo with Adrienne and Martin and keeps circling the block until Kyle comes barging in and they can get to the real fight. Kyle actually calls the valet and tells them not to let Kim leave.
This is terrible. I am hating Kyle right now. Just let the poor woman go home.
Kyle comes into the limo and wants to know what Kim is doing. Um, she is trying to go home, Kyle. Kim tells Kyle to stay away from her, and Kyle says Kim sounds insane. Kim says she doesn’t trust Kyle, and Kyle keeps saying Kim is insane. She tells Kim that her antics cause scenes, but I don’t get this. Kim was minding her own business at the party until everyone ganged up on her.
Kim calls Kyle embarrassing, and Kyle says she’s the one who is sick of being embarrassed and that she won’t defend Kim anymore. Kim mumbles that Kyle is a “fucking phony.” I agree.
Kyle comes back with, “And Mom had to die and leave me with this.” It’s so cruel. I have sisters, and we lost our mom. This is a rotten thing to say.
Kim looks like she has been punched and screams out “You stole my goddamned house!” We know this has to do with their mom’s Palm Springs house, and this accusation will develop over the next several seasons. Kyle goes on to say that she and Mauricio have helped and supported Kim tremendously through the years.
Kim calls Mauricio a liar, and Kyle grabs her purse and lunges across the limo, clearly intending to hit Kim. Then she yells, “You are a liar, and sick, and an alcoholic!” before storming out of the limo and telling Mauricio they are done with Kim.
Kim, alone in the backseat, cries that this is “really bad,” and it is. It is not normal or natural for sisters to be this cruel to each other, but the Richards sisters are great at it.
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