This week, the women of the SLC finally wrap up their San Francisco trip and return home to do some more fighting. Mary is going to be in this episode, and I am looking forward to seeing her. Let’s see if we can get past all the hypocrisy and bullshit first. We start at Angie’s house and yay! Mary is on her way over. She arrives, looking fabulous, and I am impressed. This woman has suffered a devastating loss and still manages to pull it together.
Angie starts to fill Mary in on the San Francisco drama. Angie breaks down Night 1 of the trip, and all of the drama with Quai, and the toothbrushes. The main news is Lisa and Meredith’s diss track. Mary doesn’t understand how the women can behave this way when they agreed to be sisters. Mary is planning to gather the women for a lunch so that she can hear all sides of the stories. Mary’s lunches are always eventful, so I am here for this one.
Next, we see Britani and her daughters, who have previously been estranged because Britani is a nitwit who values dick over her own children. Sorry, not sorry. Britani says that they have come a long way, and I give credit to her kids for this. She is hosting her daughter, Olivia’s birthday party, and Whitney, Bronwyn, and Heather also attend. Bronwyn still finds Britani irritating, but likes that she stood up for her when Meredith and Lisa were bashing her, so there is that, I guess.
Heather asks Bronwyn about the sale of her house and Britani immediately jumps on her with a bunch of tacky, personal questions. Bronwyn says that Todd still has access to her credit card bills and tracks when she travels. He is not happy about the new boyfriend, but Bronwyn has already met the new guy’s parents–so she is serious.
Bronwyn says that her boyfriend, Brandon, was shocked by Meredith and Lisa’s behavior at the San Francisco party. Me, too, honestly. They all question Quai and whether she has been talking shit about them, particularly Meredith. Heather doesn’t think anything that Quai said is that big of a deal, but Whitney thinks she is a liar.
We cut to Mary’s lunch party and I am excited. I hope nobody sings. I hate that shit. Mary is having a Boss Lunch to remind the women they are Boss Ladies and need to stand together. She is prepared to lead the pack, and feels the women fell apart in San Francisco without her. The women arrive and I still can’t with Meredith’s wig. She tries to greet Bronwyn, and Bronwyn is not having it. Good for her. Bronwyn says she is not hurt by Meredith and Lisa, but totally closed off to them.
Angie arrives and she did not follow Mary’s dress code, so she is in trouble. Angie updates Heather on the ups and downs in her marriage. It doesn’t sound good. She says a good day is basically just coexisting. She is trying to keep things normal for her daughter while also figuring out her marriage. Heather says she owes all of her success to her own divorce, and I guess that’s meant to be a pep talk.
They move to the table, and Robert Sr. has sent floral arrangements for each of the women. I love this. I wouldn’t mind seeing more of Robert Sr., but I definitely get why he keeps a low profile.
Whitney jumps right into an apology for her past drunken behavior and says that she is going through a lot. Lisa questions her, but Whitney is not ready to share. Lisa calls bullshit, and Mary says Whitney’s past behavior reflects badly on all of the women. Whitney apologizes, but also says that Meredith and Lisa’s behavior in San Francisco was equally embarrassing to the group. I concur.
Whitney is offended on Bronwyn’s behalf. Lisa dismisses Whitney, and Mary asks to hear everyone’s perspective. Meredith tries to explain that the diss track was not directed only at Bronwyn and Meredith then starts insulting Bronwyn and her past lawsuits. They speak over one another and don’t get anywhere. Meredith and Lisa say they expected Bronwyn to find their performance funny. She clearly did not, and tells them they embarrassed themselves–which is accurate. Meredith apologizes for hurting Bronwyn, and Bronwyn agrees not to mention it again.
Whitney is stunned that Meredith actually apologized. Everyone looks to Lisa, but she has nothing to say. She says she doesn’t feel bad at all, and still doesn’t. She says the song was accurate, and that she won’t give an apology she doesn’t mean. She’d rather right a check. If I were Bronwyn, I would take the check over the apology any day.
Lisa starts singing “Hypocrisy and Bullshit” and it has been stuck in my head for a week so I am super annoyed. Mary cuts her dead and says they are done with this. Lisa says it’s about authenticity, and Mary is not having her crap. Meredith jumps right on Whitney and says she tried to take her down, and that it is malignant and pathetic. Ooh, somebody has word-of-the-day toilet paper. No one has any idea what she is talking about, including Whitney.
Quai says she is the one who told Meredith that Whitney was rallying everyone against her. Sigh. I don’t like new girls. I am getting old and grumpy like Vicki, and Quai is working my last nerve. Why is she wearing that dumb little hat? Anyhow, Quai admits she lied and that she has talked negatively about Meredith, but that she has already apologized and made peace with her, and spilled the beans on all the things Whitney has said. Apparently, she said the group hoped that Quai was coming on the show to edge Meredith out. Whitney says this is total bullshit.
Lisa suspects that Angie, Heather, and Britani are the ones who want Meredith gone, and this is probably a safe bet, but I am sure Whitney does, too. Quai and Whitney argue for a bit about which of them talks more shit. Quai says that Whitney actually recorded her, and Whitney denies it. We see a scene of Angie saying Whitney has cameras all over her house. Doesn’t everyone? I totally do. Whitney admits that she probably said she wants Meredith gone, and that she still does.
Mary pipes up and says she is disappointed in all of the women. They all agreed to be sisters to each other, and after what Mary has suffered, she expected more from the women. She cries and calls out Lisa for not apologizing and tells Whitney to stop being so messy. It’s solid advice. She wants all of the women to do better, but she also clearly wants them to get the hell out of her lunch. They don’t have to go home, but they can’t stay there.
Later, at Meredith’s, Brooks is looking very blond and I don’t get it. What is going on with the hair in the Marks’ family? We cut to Whitney having Quai over to her house. I hope she has her cameras on, oh, nevermind, Bravo is there. Why do these women worry about being recorded when they literally let production film them on the toilet? I dunno. Hypocrisy and bullshit, I guess.
Whitney says she is shocked and heartbroken by how Quai has come into the group. Quai says Whitney is the source of all of the drama. Whitney wants to save their friendship because she values their shared history, and they agree to work on trusting each other more. Good luck.
On a Girls’ night out, Heather, Lisa, Mary, and Angie meet up for dinner. Where are the other women? They all talk about Robert Sr. and how sweet he is, and Mary says that Britani stole her flowers from the lunch party. Britani is a horror show. Mary wants to smack her and I would write a Lisa Barlow check to see that go down.
Angie thinks that Britani brings flowers to nursing homes to try and get in people’s wills. I could see this.
Mary asks Angie how Sean is and there is some awkward silence. Mary pushes a little bit and Angie says it is an interesting question. She hedges around the issue and says they have been busy. Mary can tell something is off, and Angie diverts the attention to Heather’s relationship. Heather is planning a party to introduce him to the group. Brave girl.
Lisa is lining her lips again. What is that about?
Heather says that Britani is on the hunt to get in Bronwyn’s business and expose stuff about the sale of her house. Yuck. Britani is way too involved in other people’s business, and it’s tacky. Heather says she has her own questions about Bronwyn, and Angie agrees. Lisa says everything about Bronwyn is a ruse, and implies that even her boyfriend is a publicity stunt. We leave off with all of the women questioning whether anything about Bronwyn is real.
Leave a Reply